Researchers have discovered the formula for creating change. And whether you want to get in shape, stop smoking or heal from an affair, the ingredients for breakthrough changes are the same.

Fast Company journalist Alan Deutschman, in his powerful book, Change or Die identifies three critical keys—what he calls the three “R’s”—that must be present in order for people to make a lasting change.

Here is his proven formula – all 3 of these elements that must be present for lasting change to happen:

1. Relate – You must first find a mentor—someone who has been where you are, healed themselves and is now experiencing life in the way you would like to. You need to form a relationship with your mentor that inspires and helps you sustain hope. This mentor has to believe you have the ability to change. And your mentor must possess specific methods and strategies for creating the results that you want.

...repetition heals

Though I was once completely devastated by betrayal, there’s a good chance that where I am today is exactly where you want to be. I learned how to heal from the affair and transform depression, anger, and feelings of low self-worth into a profound sense of peace-of-mind, joy and passion…much more than I had than before the affair.

2. Repeat – To create permanent change, you need to rely on your new mentoring relationship to help you learn, practice and master the new habits and skills that you’ll need to create the results you want.

In other words, repetition heals.

But it has to be the right kind of repetition. This is why I offer programs that offer you the kind of repetition you will need to practice to make meaningful changes.

You will need a strong, clear and compassionate mentor to help you... 

3. Reframe – Finally, you need to allow your new mentoring relationship to help you learn new ways of thinking about your situation and your life. Your mentor will need to help you change formerly limiting beliefs about yourself and your situation into beliefs that will support your growth and change.

There’s nothing quite like the devastation of an affair to spiral you into negative thought patterns that can erode—and even destroy—your self-esteem. You will need a strong, clear and compassionate mentor to help you undo these limiting beliefs and help you replace them will the belief system that will transform pain into relief and then joy.

Your mentor must possess specific methods and strategies for creating the results you want.


I can help you.

If you are willing, I can show you the way. As a person who truly “walks the talk,” I am confident that I can offer you the skills, the insights, and the compassion that can help you create the breakthrough you long for.

If you are at all called to this work, I encourage you to fill out the form below to schedule a complimentary Heal from the Affair Breakthrough discovery session.

So if you are someone who:

1. Is truly ready to transform
2. Is willing to take full responsibility for your role in creating your life
3. Is financially sound and ready to fully commit to yourself

Then private coaching with me may be for you.

Fill out the application below for a free 90-minute Heal from the Affair Breakthrough Session with me. We’ll meet in person if you are in the Los Angeles area or by video if you live out of the area. You will get clear about what’s blocking your ability to heal, and what you need to do first to move on from the pain.

Please only apply if you are serious about private coaching, as I have limited space available for these sessions.

I acknowledge your courage to show up for yourself in this way.




Contact Vickie regarding Coaching